NEGATIVE ENERGY

ITS REAALL WIERD TO ME...I SEEM TO ATTRACT THE MOST NEGATIVE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE. I DO NOT KNOW IF IT IS ME OR AM I A MAGNET FOR NEGATIVE ENERGY!!! I HAVE NO GOOD LUCK WITH MEN, I SEEM TO ATTRACT ALL ASSHOLES. I AM TRYING TO DO SELF-EVALUATING, BUT THIS TIME I REALIZE ITS NOT ALL THE WAY ME. I DO NOT WANT TO SETTLE FOR BEING THE FRIEND, JUST THE FRIEND. I AM NOT GOING TO GIVE MYSELF TO SOMEONE AND THEY NOT GIVE ME SHIT. I GIVE SO MUCH OF MYSELF, AND AT THE END I RECEIVE NOTHING. IT HURTS ME SO BAD THAT I KEEP HAVING PEOPLE ENTER MY LIFE THAT ARE COMPLETELY SELFISH AND NO GOOD FOR ME. I DO NOT THINK I AM HARD TO PLEASE, I AM A GOOD PERSON, BUT I DO KNOW I REFUSE TO GET LESS THAN THE BEST. MEN SEEM TO THINK I AM WRONG FOR THAT. I HATE GETTING THE RUN AROUND, NOT A PRIORITY, AND NOT THE SIGNIFICANT. SHIT, I AM TIRED!!! BEYOND FED UP, I HAVE BEEN SCORNED AND HURT BY PEOPLE SO BAD THAT I REALLY WISH I DID NOT LIVE IN THIS WORLD FULL OF DECEITFUL PEOPLE. I KNOW THERE ARE GOOD PEOPLE OUT THERE, BUT EMPRESS SEEMS TO NEVER SEEMS TO FIND THEM. I FIND PEOPLE THAT HAVE A LOT OF NEGATIVE ENERGY, THAT ARE SO FULL OF THEMSELVES THAT THEY CANNOT APPRECIATE MY BEAUTY, MY ESSENCE!! I AM SO CHANGING AND GROWING RIGHT NOW, ITS UNBELIEVABLE. I AM GETTING STRONGER BY THE DAY, AND I LOVE IT. HOWEVER, THIS ROAD IS A LITTLE LONELY NOW. ISOLATED!!! I GUESS I AM FINDING MYSELF, LEARNING MORE ABOUT ME, BUT I DID NOT KNOW WHEN I GOT HERE IT WOULD FEEL LIKE THIS. MAYBE THATS Y I AM SO FRUSTRATED. I JUST WANT TO BE ME, AND PEOPLE LOVE ME FOR ME!! I AM WHO I AM, AND I CAN NOT CHANGE THAT. I WOULD NOT CHANGE IT FOR THE WORLD. BUT I DO WANT TO BE WORTH IT TO SOMEONE. BUT I GUESS WHAT DOES NOT KILL ME WILL MAKE ME STRONGER. ONLY IF I COULD SEE WHAT THIS IS PREPARING ME, ONLY IF I KNEW THE SIGNIFICANCE MAYBE I WOULD BE A LITTLE MORE AT PEACE. I TRY TO BE LOYAL, LOVING, RIDE OR DIE CHIC, ETC. BUT ITS NOT ENOUGH. THEN I FIND MYSELF COMPROMISING ME BY TEACHING PEOPLE HOW TO TREAT ME, LOVE ME, AND APPRECIATE ME. IF THEY CANNOT GET IT RIGHT, THAN I SHOULD KEEP IT MOVING, BUT SOMETIMES I WISH THEY WOULD JUST GET IT TOGETHER. I KNOW NO ONE IS PERFECT BUT I SEEM TO GET THE REAL MESSED UP ONES. ALL THE MESSED UP ONES, LITERALLY!!!